Six days, seven nights...

Here's the week in review:

Smell Sensitivity set to LOW - The main part of my job is to walk apartments as people move out and get them ready (schedule contractors, supervise work, etc.) for the next resident. I walked this one apartment and did not think it was too bad. The next day, one of our maintenance guys comes to me and says, "You're getting the carpet changed in there, aren't you?" I told him I wasn't planning on it. He then told me he and another maintenance guy couldn't even work in there because it smelled so bad! I told him I'd go ahead and have it tested for pet urine just to be safe, even though I didn't smell anything (the person didn't have a pet lease so it was not automatically tested). Sure enough, there were urine stains all over - and I didn't smell a thing! What's up with this nose?

What I Love: March Edition
*Little packets of calorie free drink mix for your water bottle
*Nature's Valley Almond Crunch Granola Bars
*Advantage Flea and Tick Medication
*Popsicles

Newsworthy
Did you know that you are entitled to one free credit report per year from the each of the three major credit reporting agencies? I just learned that today and Kent and I both took a look at our credit reports. I only have a little piece of credit. That's good, I guess, considering I've never had a credit card. We thought someone was stealing Kent's identity, so that was a little scary...although incorrect. You should definitely check your credit report. It will be interesting.

Unlikely Events
*I ORDERED OUR WEDDING PICTURES!!!!!
*Some flowers I planted bloomed! (see pictures below)

I know Brad Pitt has a lot of money, but...

We all know that Brad Pitt has TONS of money. But it's really just flaunting it when you pay to have your internal battles decided on a basket ball court.

Have you no shame, Brad? HAVE-YOU-NO-SHAME?

"What a splendid head, yet no brain." - Aesop

Throughout my full-grown life I've gained weight and lost weight, cut my hair short and grown it long, gotten a tan then faded to a pasty white - there have been many changes. But, in this ever changing world there's one thing that remains constant:

MY GIANT HEAD!

Before you start with the obligatory, "No, your head's not big!" Let me just explain that it is giant and I'm okay with it.

Men's size Large hats are tight on my oversized, bobble head.

My graduation caps have had to be attached with clips and hairpins because they bust off of my gargantuan head.

I once needed a big, floppy hat for a murder mystery dinner. Kent's mom offered to let me borrow one of hers. I said that it would probably be too small. I tried it on anyway....and...I could not pull it down. It just kind of floated on top of my inflated, balloon head.

If I follow a crochet pattern to make myself a hat, I have to continuously add stitches so it will fit my big, fat, rock head.

Yes, so, my head is indeed a large one but I think I'm going to keep it because nothing is funnier at 7:00 in the morning than not being able to fit your head through the head-hole in your sweater.

The Loot

Here are some of our treasures from the St. Patrick's Day parade on Sunday.

VEGGIES! Cabbage, carrots, onion and potatoes. I've already made a delicious vegetable soup with some chicken stock I had frozen. I've also made some plain cabbage with salt and pepper...mmmmm!


Although we didn't catch a chicken foot at this parade. We did catch some chicken flavored Ramen noodles.


This was my favorite catch, of all. If you can't tell, it's a shamrock windchime.

I'm a published humorist!

Yes, I am! Well, okay it's only in the Interfax Daily but according to itself, it's "seen by thousands of employed readers every weekday." My joke is not really that funny, but it is along the lines of what usually runs in the Interfax Daily. What's even more exciting is that it won us some FREE FOOD!!

By the way, if you can't read the joke here it is:

Q. Why does Barbie look so good for her age?

A. Because she has a great PLASTIC surgeon!

Happy Anniversary, Sicko!

Kent's and my 4th Anniversary is coming up soon. We've been hemming and hawwing about whether or not to buy each other gifts, what to do to celebrate and all of that business. Well, we finally decided what to get each other. I know its a bit early, but what can you do, right? We gave each other a pre-anniversary stomach virus! That's right! And in a house with only one bathroom it's really helped us learn the value of compromise, and that's the real gift. Don't you agree?

Seriously, we've been vomitting our guts out.

We just decided this was the absolute perfect gift. Besides, nothing says "I'm still the girl you married" like regurgitated granola stuck to your neck.



**Bonus**
Yes, I Am Supposed to be an Adult
Yesterday I went to work thinking I could stick it out. I hate to lose money and I won't have any sick days until May 1st. Well, I couldn't stick it out. I hadn't thrown up but I could feel it coming. So I told my boss I needed to go home and I left. I stopped by walgreens to get some Lysol and crackers. While I was in line I started to feel really weak and hot and nauseated. The girl two people in front of me was buying enough gum and soap to freshen the breath of and clean like 20 elephants. I couldn't take it. I rushed out of the store to get some air. I thought I'd composed myself and went back in. I started to feel sick again and thought maybe I just need to go to the bathroom. So, I asked a girl who worked there where the restroom was. Aisle 9C. I walked towards aisle 9C and was about one aisle away when I realized, "Oh, no I'm going to puke" I had to push past a man with my hand over my mouth. I made it to aisle 9C, but there was no sign for a bathroom. Then the vomit came. I stood there, like a kid, vomitting all over the medicine aisle, my feet and my pants (but not a drop on my super cute, new, beaded wristlet I got last weekend). Of course, then I started crying. Not just a sniffling crying, but a BOO HOO HOO. The same man that I'd pushed past earlier came over and said, "do you need some help?" He didn't even work at the store. I sobbed and said "I'm sick and I can't find the bathroom, but don't come over here. You don't want to see this." Then the manager showed up and helped me to the bathroom. I realized I must've looked crazy with mascara streaming down my face and vomit all over my pants. I came out of the bathroom and asked for a mop so I could clean up my mess, but he insisted they'd do it. So, I walked out of the store as calmly as I could and left. When's the last time you've seen a "grown-up", not drunk, and vommitting in a store?

What a knockout!!

You may, or may not, know some of Kent's and my "sleeping" stories, or should I say antics. Well, add another to the list. I woke up Wednesday morning with a sore and a little clogged nose. As the day progressed I tried to blow my nose, but nothing would come out. Not to mention, it was getting more and more painful. Finally, by the evening my nose was really sore and not the cartilage part, but the bone and surrounding area. I was stumped. Kent and I really did not remember me hitting my face on anything and that is something that's usually hard to forget. As we got ready to go to bed that night I noticed a smear of blood on my pillow! At first I thought, "GROSS!" Then, after changing the pillow case and thinking about it a little longer, we realized what probably happened to my nose.

You may have heard the story about the time, when Kent and I had been married for only a few months and I had a mid-morning mishap. I rolled onto my back (which I usually don't do and for good reason) and was probably 1/4 awake. All of the sudden, Kent elbows me full force in the chest. I yell, of course, and he wakes up. Turns out, he was fighting someone off his back in his dream and I guess I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

All of that to say, we think somehow some part of Kent, whether it was his head, his elbow or his hand, hit me in the nose during the night. I got hit so hard that it left a bruise and was sore for 5 days! How I didn't wake up during the incident, I don't know.